Monday, 14 March 2011


I didn't realise it had been quite so long since I last posted! To be honest, not much has happened....

I had a CT scan of my chest, I haven't heard anything back following this so I'm taking no news as good news and hoping that I haven't developed bronchiectasis. I had my DEXA scan today, the results are right on the border between oestopenia and healthy, not great but better than my last one in 2006 so I'm relatively happy with that :)

My horrible lungs are still, well, horrible! The last time I had a undisturbed nights sleep was last year sometime, I've just had to accept this is life now! I really notice my stupid lungs when I'm walking with other people, I can't walk and talk at their pace, I get breathless so easily, I find it extremely frustrating and embarrassing. Actually, I get very breathless when I'm walking on my own at my own pace, but I suppose I notice it more and feel more self conscious when I'm with other people :( I wasn't going to reapply for my DLA when it's expires later this year, but it appears that my optimism that my asthma was improving was just that, optimism :( Ahh well, it could be worse, at least I'm not in and out of hospital every other week like I used to be!

I'm still not back at work despite my numerous emails and phone calls. I've now been off for a year, granted it was almost 2 years last time this happened, but still, it's not helping my 'battle' to get back to nursing on wards when I can't even sit in an office..... it would have been so much easier for me to accept medical retirement back in 2007... but I refused to give up then and I refuse to give up now.

And apart from all that, I'm trying to keep myself busy so I don't have too much time to sit and dwell on things. I'm still enjoying volunteering for the Samartians, although it's disturbing how many sex calls or people phoning up to hurl abuse down the phone we get! I do my shifts in the afternoon or evening as my lungs don't like mornings, sometimes it can take a few hours for the wheeze and breathlessness to ease off. I'm having issues when it comes to night shifts - wheezing and coughing down the phone isn't great, so once I've completed all the nights required to become a fully trained Samaritan, as opposed to a New Samaritan, I might have to look at whether volunteering on nights is good for me.
I'm also making an effort to meet up with friends, and have fun drinking cocktails, my favourite pastime :D Haha seriously, I think it would be so easy for me to sit at home moping about how awful my life is, how ill I am blah blah blah, I'm making sure I have some fun times so life isn't all doom and gloom :)

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